Tuesday, December 13, 2005

Human Brain cells in Mice

In Transylvania today, stem cell scientists have announced that they have been able to grow human brain cells in newly born mice. Mice are greater than 97% identical in genetic composition to humans. The percentage of human brain cells grown appears to be only 0.1% of the mice's total brain cells.

When asked how the human brain cells affected the mice, scientists responded by saying "Don't worry. They are not very smart. You'd be surprised what dumb things they said to us."

Scientists believe that growing the human brain cells in mice will help them resolve unknowns related to human brain diseases. One interviewer asked if the brain cells were from parkinson's patients or from the general population. Igor Nrgtun, chief of neurological sciences indicated that they were from a patient called Abby Normal.

This pioneering research could lead to new industries as well as new cures to disease. Representatives from the technology industry were very interested in utilizing the technique to make computers that think using human brain pathways. Representatives from Sony indicated that the technique could be useful in their robotics division.

Walt Disney Productions representatives greeted the news with quiet assuredness. "We've had talking mice for many years. Why do you think we froze Walt?"

We'll see what the future will bring.

Asbestos

Thursday, September 08, 2005

Scientists believe human brain still evolving

When I was young, my father used to tell me the older I got, the stupider I got, but I think his conclusion was more emotional than scientific. Now we have scientific proof that my father was wrong.

For many years, it was thought that the human brain had evolved as far as it could. More intelligent scientists now believe they have found this to be incorrect. The old gang of scientists that reported the earlier belief seem to have not evolved to the point that the new scientists have. In a study of their own brain development, scientists with highly developed and newly mutated brains have discovered new mutations in two brain related genes that they believe may cause enhanced brain activity or new personality characteristics. One of these characteristics, they believe to be increased modesty.

Scientists report this news simply as a new benefit of evolution. This leaves me puzzled. Shouldn't we be concerned about why this is occuring? For example, if beneficial gene mutation is the result of evolutionary adaptation to adversity, does this finding mean that our brains are telling us that we need to think differently? Humans are already the most intelligent species of all living creatures. Most of us don't use the brains that we have. Why else would our brains be trying to change?

Maybe these genes are really the morality genes that we all seem to be lacking lately. Maybe they are the empathy genes that we seem to be short of. Maybe they are the common sense genes that are getting more sensible. Maybe they will specialize to conform to our professions. I'd love to see an honest used car salesman. A reasonable judge. A business owner that can be trusted. A movie producer or media mogul that doesn't contribute to the perversion of society.

So to the future reader I say, if this blog stays posted for the next 10,000 years, let me know how it turns out in 12005, by leaving a comment!

Sunday, August 28, 2005

Chavez says "Even my french fries are trying to kill me."

According to a recent editorial published in the California Kronical, Venezula President Hugo Chavez is now claiming that contrary to his earlier belief, it is not President Bush or US Evangelist Pat Robertson that want him dead. It is his french fries.

Chavez, along with California Attorney General Bill Lockyer has filed a lawsuit to force manufacturers of french fries to include a warning about potential cancer causing agents present in cooked french fries.

Chavez explained to the press that if the french fries killed him, Bush would be to blame. Although french fries are one of Chavez's favorite foods, Venezuela's government has temporarily suspended sale of french fries in the country. Persons found carrying french fries into the country are subject to arrest for attempted assassination.
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